Friday, November 25, 2016

New Owner

Of this Chevy Cruze.  It is way smarter than me with some temporary perks.  My Altima that I had less than 4 years was dying.  My dad said I needed to buy a new car so G and I headed to a dealership owned by some folks with whom I go to church.  Anyway, I hate chevys normally but I am enjoying this one.  It is very low on miles, literally the lowest miles I have ever purchased on a car.  It is also the most expensive I have every had.  I came in to say that I could only pay a certain amount but I knew I could pay a bit more.  Of course I am now not able to pay rent to my dad.  He said that was okay I will try to figure something out and pay something on rent.  I haven't had a car payment in almost 20 years.  This is going to take a while to pay off.  Truly this is a way smarter car than I am.

It is smaller than our altima but it is a prettier color and has a sunroof.  G likes that it is a smart car but I can't afford to add it to my phone wi-fi and I can't afford to pay the onstar after the 6 months is up and I can't afford to pay the xm after the 90 days is up.  We will see how smart it is after that time frame.  I may not be able to pay the additional insurance on the car.  I have to contact them on Monday.  I wasn't even planning to buy a car but just put the word out on about looking for a new to me car. They had one and could get my payments where I needed them so I went for it.

So now I need to pray that I keep my job until the car is paid off and that I can afford some sort of rent payment.  If dad is okay with no rent then I may still b able to pay the private school fees next year as well.  Again we will have to see.  I am praying for school fees as well as acceptance to the school and a great grade on the entrance exam.  So pray with me if you feel led.

Friday, October 28, 2016


This presidential season is full of uncertainties and really bad candidates.  Of course when you vote for one you are not just voting for that person but for all of the political appointees that person makes.  I voted for the administration that aligns closest to my beliefs such as pro-life, pro-traditional marriage, anti-PC and a much more careful immigration policy that favors those coming legally rather than crossing without vetting or permission (basically enforcing what we have).  I am sure you can see who that would be.  Early voting baby~

So today leaving work I turned too sharply while backing out forgetting that I was parked next to a guy wire.  Then 45 mins later when I drove into my dad's driveway something long and plastic fell off of my car.  YEA!! ME!!  I just recently had to borrow money to have the radiator fixed in my car and some other big things fixed as well as replace all my tires.

My mother is getting worse.  My dad has reached out for help through our state's area on aging.  They have a homebound nurse coming not very often but often enough to help with her care.  She still is particular with what she eats and she prefers ice cream.  I am thinking at this point, darn the diabetes and let her have the ice cream.  She "has" pre-diabetes supposedly.  I mean this disease is going to kill her why not let her have the food she wants and can enjoy now while she can eat it??  Yes it might cause difficulty in the process but it is already a difficult process!!

G is doing well.  Due to my mother's rapidly declining health I am investigating a different (closer to my work) school and would appreciate prayers for the financing.  She is taking a huge placement test on Dec 3 so prayers for that as well.  We need to be working on taking pre-tests.  It is a massive undertaking.

The school where G is now focuses more on projects than core which I am not sure will help G, who is 6 years away from college, succeed in college.  I do want her to learn how to use the machines but I need her to learn core things too.  She claims she wants to be a saleswoman.  I don't see it.  She has a lot to learn to become one particularly how to talk to people.  I will say that the kinderg√§rtners who are there now will be fine because I think by the time college comes for them the colleges will be very different.

G and I have taken advantage of our zoo membership and gone several times in the morning because parking is now a nightmare so it is best to get there early and stay through lunch which we bring.  The older I get the less I want to be in crowds or drive around crowds or guy wires for that matter.

G became interested in learning cross stitch so I taught her from a set she purchased.  Her interest got my interest back so I am trying to finish some of the projects I started but failed to complete.  I found the Christmas ornaments I never framed but may do so this year and give them as gifts to my nephews that never got one.  G said we will put them on our tree instead.

On Thursday nights I am in a BSF class.  We are going through the book of John.  I finished reading the Bible to G now we are doing the family BSF sheets at night.  Saturation in the book of John is lovely.  G is being faced with some interesting things at school.  She needs truth poured into her and we both seek forgiveness for our sins and learn to live in His grace and mercy.

So the holidays are also upon us.  G is going as Charlie Brown dressed as a ghost from the It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.  I had an old sheet we used.  They will trick or treat at school on Monday.  Our church is doing something Sunday afternoon.  She wants to trick or treat at age 12.

I don't think that this Thanksgiving holiday we will have the money to paint anything so my room and bathroom will just have to keep on waiting.  G's fish is doing well thought I have been thinking that if we have a severe winter like they are predicting then things will be very bad for it.  If the power goes out for any significant time the fish will just freeze to death.  Doesn't take much to kill a betta.  I haven't pointed this out to G yet.  Best to wait and quit borrowing trouble.

Anyway, that is the update.  I think the blog's time is near an end.  I have to be careful of G and her privacy as she gets older.  I might start blogging about politics but am not sure I will have the time to devote to that.  I will try to post some photos later of her in costume.  I may decide to keep it up for the next year and end it.  Still thinking on it.  Anyway, that is all for now.

Sunday, September 11, 2016


Fifteen years later and we are not safer.  We are not safer because our ruling elites refuse to acknowledge the link between an ideology that teaches all unbelievers are infidels who deserve death and the followers of that belief system.  SJWs stand shoulder to shoulder with those who wish to oppress our free people under sharia.  Social Justice Warriors are using political correctness to do the same as sharia, take away the freedoms given to us by God, not government.

I want my country back.  I want 100% assimilation to Western ideals and Western beliefs which are not compatible with islam.  There I said it, and I believe it.  The change though will not come from government.  The change will only come from the heart as individuals come to meet Christ.  Therein lies the Christian's work:  pray for those who persecute you and love your enemies.  God can and will change the hearts of His enemies, as we all are born enemies of His (Romans 5:8).  He took the first step of redemption which was the cross, and in His resurrection He offers redemption to the world (John 3:16).

Even if our government takes away our freedoms as they seem determined to do, I will stand and proclaim God's truth from His word no matter the cost.

On to updates:  mom is still confused.  Friday she continued to ask me if I picked up one of those children.  She even said she thought it was going to be a boy when I pointed to G.  She asked me if I talk to her mom and when I explained she is dead, mom said she knew that.

So I told her I didn't and then she said, "Something about this ain't right."

Found out last week that my cousin has 3rd stage breast cancer and lymph nodes are engaged.  She will have treatment and then surgery in February.  She starts her treatment the week of her birthday which is soon.

G came home Friday from school in such a foul mood.  I just went to bed after getting the dishes done.  I wonder now (of course after the fact) if her feelings were hurt because of mom's memory.  Surely not though because she knows.  I know it still hurts but mom seemed to understand that G belongs and wondered if I was bringing another child not G.  It seemed that in her mind G belongs and wasn't the one I was going to get.

Currently, G is at youth group.  Once upon a time our youth group was or seemed like a very huge cohesive fun and friendly group.  Those kids graduated and it doesn't seem to have the same cohesion.  G is miserable in it but won't invite her friends from my parent's church to come.  It is important that she goes.  Mostly the group seems to be shrinking.  The kids in the group are still super nice but there is a definite age divide that is bigger than it used to be.

Twelve is a hard age and everything is terrible or so believes G.  She told me Friday that her life is terrible and when I tried to compare her life to a child in oh, I don't know, let's say Syria she said, "There can be two kinds of terrible."  Fair enough.

I am praying for compassion for her from me.  At least Friday I didn't have any.  She doesn't like her ride to and from school which is causing me great consternation because I know she is miserable but I haven't an option right now.  She is also mad that she has to leave at 3pm because her ride is a primary student who leaves at 3.

She told me that if we were the ones giving someone a ride and the person couldn't leave until 10 after we could that we would wait.  I told her that she was right because to me, I would have made a commitment and we would have put our own time and comfort aside to make sure that person could get home.  We are not the same people, what can I say?

Work is going well as far as I can tell.  I am still so grateful to have a job.  I do wish it were closer to home so I wouldn't have to spend so much on gas every week.  G and I bought some house plants Saturday.  She is currently obsessed by succulents and no, I don't know why.  She bought 2.  I bought some air purifying plants and a philodendron. We really don't have enough light for plants but what ever.  I sealed our game side of the table yesterday but ended up hurting the original side so I painted the mess ups and will re-seal that next week.

G bought the Hunger Games movie ($3.74 at WalMart).  I hate that movie.  I saw it with her on DVD and have warned her that I will not watch it with her.  She started it today at 2:30 while I was napping but when I got up it was still on. I wasn't happy.

I hate everything about that movie and book series though I can see how it can be a political commentary on our own country with the coastal elites so out of touch with the "fly over" country.  The violence doesn't make it enjoyable even with the commentary.

Anyway,  maybe I will or not keep the blog updated.  As G gets older her privacy is more important.  I guess I don't have as much to say either in general.  So now that school has started we are back in the swing.  I have to remember to fix G lunch which honestly is harder than it seems after a year off.

Have a great week and never forget to pray for those who protect us from all enemies foreign and domestic.

Thursday, September 08, 2016


The 1st day of school. This year it started 2 days before last year.

She was very excited to go to school today.  She has been ready to start and though there were no delays like last year the school wasn't completely ready.  Her class had no smart board nor had any internet access.

I took today off as a tradition of dropping her off and picking her up for the first day.  Yes, I could have gone to work for 5 hours but I wanted some me time.  I will have driven to her school 3 times today, once to drop her off, then to pick her up and finally to go to a parents' meeting at 6.  G will have to stay with my parents after school.

Her teacher is a hunter. At first I was okay with him but I glanced at some of  his book choices in the class and am left feeling unimpressed and afraid of his potential marxist SJW tendencies.  I will just have to watch what happens and what G brings home to read.  He has said that he will not require students to read anything like the last teacher did.

A week before school started the end times for school changed for the older kids.  I am hoping that our ride doesn't mind waiting 10 minutes to pick G up beginning tomorrow.  G still wants to go to my parents so I am  hoping they will still be able to pick her up at our ride's home.  It will give my mom a break in the day too.

My mom is so much better and almost back to where she was before her fall but it has been a month and a half so she is where she is expected to be.  She has been able to go back to swim but long car drives are not good for her.

My cousin just called to tell me that she has stage 3 breast cancer.  She is starting treatment on her birthday next week.  Makes me sad and worried.

I turned another year older and spent that morning with G at the zoo.  The weather was very nice. The elephant was just hanging out drinking water and eating hay.  His back legs were just resting, heh.

Monday, G and I painted the other side of the train table top with the three game boards. We will seal it this Saturday. We are trying to grow our train table up into a more adult coffee table/fun table. I plan on painting it a light brown with a dark brown wood texture over it. I haven't gotten the texture roller yet. At least I thought you could get a roller to do it but maybe it is a 1/4 role instead. I also haven't picked up the paint yet.

We completed two more puzzles and have 2 more to go.  Walmart had a clearance.  We don't save them like G and my dad do.  We just give them away after completing them.  G and dad would always glue their's on a board to keep.  I think that started with me wanting to keep the valentine charlie brown and snoopy one and then the harry potter puzzles that we framed.  But we now have a record of the puzzles they did for memories.

So off to get her from her 1st day of school!!  I hope it was good.  We both feared that lunch would be assigned seats and sure enough I discovered before her that it is assigned.  She will hate that.

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

A Story I Want to Remember

This was told about my grandmother on my mother's side by my mother's sister.  When my grandmother was a child she had an experience with lightening that would make her fearful of storms the rest of her life.

Details are sketchy now so all I have is the jist of the story.  My grandmother and at least one of her 9 siblings were sitting on a bench in their living room as children during a thunderstorm when lightening struck and hit their cat which was in the middle of the floor.  It killed the cat and flipped over the bench with my grandmother and her sibling on it.  She never felt safe in a thunderstorm again.

Tuesday, August 02, 2016

Not a Pleasant Update

But first a photo

This is G at the organized mass chaos at Centrikids camp at OBU the week of 7-25 to 7-29.  She left on our 11th family anniversary.  She had such a good time and came home talking about two girls she met there who were sisters.  We ran into the church leader who took them to camp at the wally world parking lot, and I asked about the girls and their mom.  As it happened he said the mom worked there, told us where and she was easy to locate so we gave her G's number to pass on to the girls.  Now they can stay in contact.

Onto the bad, my mom fell Thursday morning around 2 a.m.  Dad didn't know she had even gotten up so he didn't know it until it was too late.  She has a spinal compression fracture.  The ambulance had to come get her.  They got home around 930 that morning.

This morning she tried to get up, and he didn't hear her and she fell (not as hard) on the floor by her bed.  She won't stay in bed but she can't set up for long.  She doesn't realize she is home.  He needs an alarm for her so he can sleep and will wake him if she gets up.

Anyway, my dad is a prisoner because no one can spend all day with her for bathroom needs. Tonight when I got ready to leave from sitting by her bedside she tried to get up.  I texted G who was in the den and told her to grab dad and come back where we were.  She tried to get up again and dad stopped her.  I had already offered to stay so dad could get his shower, but he declined.  Now I think I should have made him.  I will tomorrow.  G will mow his yard for him.   Yes, G can sit with her and not let her get up but she can't help with potty needs or food needs.

So there we are now a bit farther down the road of Alzheimer's as each trauma pushes it a bit farther.  This has been just as traumatic for my dad.  He blames himself of all of it.  He had forgotten to turn on the night light in the bathroom so she couldn't see.  He even blames himself for giving her too much medication that made her get up and fall this morning.  She doesn't take medicine well anyway and he was trying to stay ahead of the pain.  He doesn't want her to hurt.

The love between them is just so uplifting to watch.  He just loves her.  She thought she saw him yesterday while I sat with her (he wasn't there) and pointed to him with a smile on her face told me to look at him.  I think she saw a photo of him but she believed it to be him.  He had walked out of the room.  I asked if she meant the photo and she described where he was "standing" but he wasn't there.
She asked about her mother today and I had to remind her that she has been dead for over 10 years.  She gave me the "talk to the hand" hand.  I had to remind her what year it is and that the grandparents are all gone.  I don't like that task.

If you readers (if there are any) think about her, please pray for them both.  There is a reason God is allowing this to happen and of course we will all die of our last disease, illness or accident.  So we are just watching the process in slow motion.  One day, she will be with her Savior free from this confusing disease.  Until then we remain in the church militant praying against the gates of hell so that it will not stand.  Death was defeated when Christ rose from the grave.  He is alive.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Some Photos to Share

This is a sunflower from my yard that I accidentally knocked over while mowing. The others are my gladiolas.

G and I are doing some painting. We painted the train table (green part) the same as the door that I haven't gotten used to yet. We plan on painting the white part a light brown then paint a darker brown over it with a special texture roller to make it a wood grain. My mom and I did that to her headboard a long time ago.


Last week while I waited on G to get done at VBS there was a really cool group of clouds that had a storm inside of them.  They were totally gorgeous.  The sun was behind me while I filmed but the light looked like sun in the clouds but in the video you can see the lightening.  I am sure at some point I have seen that before but that night it was a spectacular scene to me.  I stood and took videos and praised God in my heart for the beauty and majesty He created in storm clouds.

This Sunday while I napped G painted our failed mod podge table yellow. I don't know but somehow the yellow makes the mod podge part not look so very terrible.

Mom has had more rough days. Today she didn't know who G was and was so worried about that girl and where that girl's mother was. I explained for all the good it did and maybe in the moment it did work. My mom doesn't comprehend that G is 12 and no longer a baby. She knows G's name but today couldn't put it to the face. She totally doesn't remember my youngest nephews. Of course if they were here she would and with photos she sort of knows them or at least realizes she should know them.

G will be heading off to church camp next week, and I am praying that this is the week she will take this faith as her own.  She has already given her heart to Christ, but I want her to own it for herself.  We may or may not go on a fun activity this Saturday or Sunday.  I am still thinking on that.

G has completely lost her senses with this pokemon go since I told her not to get it at all and she claims to have forgotten what I said.  She is very close to losing her phone due to some very 12 year old ideas she and a friend implemented.  I am not enjoying the 12 year old attitude she throws at me most of the time.  It is during these moments a father in the home might be a great help.  She doesn't do this in front of my parents either or really any other adult.

It is just a phase and in less than 8 years she will be 20.  I just keep remembering that won't have her much longer and relationship is very important.  The day she leaves for camp will be our 11th anniversary of being a family.  She is such an American pre-teenager.