Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

6 more to go to 500



Gosh and in all of my creativity I can't think of anything special other than a long recap and what fun is that?

This is G being silly before school and one of her on Sunday morning in her "bootiful" dress because she is "bootiful, mama."

Yes she carries her sippy cup everywhere. The apple doesn't fall far from this tree with respect to that, I always have my coffee mug with me always.

Monday, October 29, 2007

What's this? 7 more to 500?

We went to the school playground yesterday and G climbed and ran and had the best time. She wanted to go to the blue slides so she could "climb ebeything." My girl in motion.

Weekend was fairly low key. We ended up picking up some new hair clips at the wallieworld. She was very excited about that. I will post more pics tomorrow.

And Sometimes It Will Backfire

So I have been telling G that she needs to let me brush her teeth once a day (she does it the other time) and let me floss her teeth or else her teeth will fall out like Grammie's "and then we will have a big mess."

Last night in the midst of our continuing bedtime drama (whole other post), I, out of frustration with her lack of cooperation, sent her to bed without the flossing and mouth washing. Then the tears start.

She was crying very hard telling me how her teeth were going to fall out, as of that instant, and then "we will have a big mess." This drama lasted about 10 minutes mostly because I couldn't stop laughing long enough to get her. Eventually the laughter subsided on my part enough for me to pick her up out of bed to floss her teeth to which she replied, "Eww wook at that food, mama."

Friday, October 26, 2007

9 more posts to go to 500




I could probably get that tonight. Ooo, I better be thinking of the special 500th post. Anyhoo, here is a little levity for everyone. I love these.

That time again-Retro Friday


This is 20 years ago in the fall of my senior year (1987). I was the editor of our school year book and the guy is my asst. The year book I was in charge of actually won awards the next summer (after I graduated) and had been the only one to do so up to that time. If I say so myself it is wonderful and was wonderfully done and pretty much all manual. You know, cut, paste with rubber cement, crop, manually type in triplicate the instructions of the page?
I thought I was cute then. See the socks? They are blue because they matched a blue pin stripe in the shirt under the sweater I had on. Yes for years I matched my socks to my shirt and wore some type of loafers. I would love to have that body back now, not the hair though.

Beverly

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Blog Maintenance


This pic was after Christmas 2005 and she was massaging herself with a hand massager. I just love the look on her face, surprise mixed with a bit of tickling.

Okay so this cute pic needed to go with this story. So last night or maybe early this morning there was this smell in the bed. I assumed it was just wet pull up and maybe the cat or dog's breath. It didn't faze G at all. So this morning periodically we both got a wiff of it and both blamed it on the cat box (which shouldn't have smelled though because I cleaned it last night) and had our breakfast. G complained that the cat box stunk in the living room. I agreed.

So after breakfast we go to put her in the tub, usually we bathe at night but last night she didn't want to. I turn her away from me and smell "it" very strongly. I said, "Baby, it is you that stinks. What did you do?" Well, she must have slept very very good because she poo'ed her pullup and didn't even notice or feel it this morning. She hasn't poo'ed a pullup in almost a full year. Let me just say now "YUCK!!" After bath she smelled so fresh and clean. I was so shocked she didn't even realize it.

On to San Diego, my brother and his family returned to their home last night. My aunt and cousin had not as of last night. So I am not sure what damage there was but the papers are now saying something about arson. That person should be found and shot on sight for causing the damage and heartache in the loss of so many people's homes.

Next thing, do you like the new color? I was in a brown mood. I may change it again sooner rather than later or I may just leave it through November. Also, the BlogHer Ads. I thought I would try them out. Maybe enough to buy gas for the gas guzzling (paid for) SUV or Christmas for G. So if you are so inclined stop by and see what is being advertised.

I have G an eye appt. set for Nov 6 and may make a day of it with a ped check up too. I am a little slow on the appts now since no shots are required but I am leery of her eyes. I think G has a weak eye.  It is noticeable in some pics and when she is really tired. I just will feel better about it and my parents have agreed to pay for it. YEA!
It is getting cold now but I don't want to turn the heat on yet as it is predicted to warm up this weekend. Yea! I will have low energy bills for a month or so. I have to wait as long as possible for turning the heat on.

Christmas is looming in the horizon and I am just not motivated. I am so broke and have such a significantly large family. I tried to get out of Christmas this year and hurt my mom's feelings. That was a bad row, I must say. I have no idea what we are going to do. I would rather focus my energy on G and her Christmas not anyone else's. We are doing the little people additions for her. She really enjoys playing with them and watching the one video we have of them. So anything to foster a fetish I say. Care Bears one time now little people. HA!

About the media man, I never received a response back from either e-mail I sent. Oh well, he remains in his ignorance. I just wish other people who also are not educated in the ways of adoption don't take his words too seriously.


Oh and stop by Salome and Cael's (check the side bar) mom's blog. She defined some bloggers inner movie stars. I love it.

FFFF-The Computer Age





These are pics of G and her computer, "pooter." It is the leap frog system. She really likes it and was moving in some of the pics therefore the blurriness.

I don't take pics of her using my computer although we have played on my computer at the sesame site and she has typed "messages" before.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Still at it.

My response:
"I think you still just miss the point. Children are not commodities to be bought or purchased. You are right in saying they all need a break. Do you see that word, ALL, even the children born in a foreign nation.

If the US foster system would change making the system more streamlined across states as well as truly looking at the rights of children, maybe more kids would get a break. As it stands now, children are lost in the system or are returned to bio-parents who continue to abuse or neglect them.

If a person who happens to be infertile wishes to be a parent and not a temporary parent then adoption is the only option and sometimes the foreign systems have more of a guaranteed child at the end of the paper.

Currently, I am watching the foster care system in my state in order to be a foster-adopt parent. However, as a single parent I have already been shot down in several different places. Number of actual beds in the house is one reason. That may or may not be a huge issue, but it is a def. issue. Bring home salary is another huge issue in foster parenting. There are so many things that sometimes states are unwilling or unable to fix in the foster care system that helps potential foster families step forward as all of the effort is being made on the bio side in order for reunification.

Before you write another op-ed piece on this maybe you should put journalistic integrity into it and research it in your state. Take the classes required, have the home study done, and sign up to be a foster family. Can’t be too hard for you, right? You seem to think it is just a matter of immigration status or money. Why don’t you just go “buy someone else’s kid” to see how wrong your words actually are?

BM
An IA Parent"

By the way, not that it is anyone's business, I have no idea if I am infertile physically. I have never tried to have a baby "the old fashioned way" I chose to adopt as my first option. G is my first option, my first child and my child in whom I take delight.

Wordless Wednesday















For more Wordless Wednesday pics go here

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

San Diego Fires

post gone by request of subjects.

Conversations with G


Last week at our fav. restaurant G kept insisting that she didn't like the waitress.

Getting sick of hearing it especially after I repeatedly told G that it wasn't nice I said, "Well, she doesn't like you either."


To which G stopped, thought a minute and said, "Well, I'm bootiful?!"

Idiot media man is back


with responses to some comments he received. He still doesn't get it. I will respond one more time and ask again, did he, has he attempted to adopt from foster care or elsewhere. Adoption is a personal choice not a purchase of someone else's kid.

Beverly

Monday, October 22, 2007

Idiots in the media

This makes me very mad for all families who have chosen adoption. I responded to this article and suggest you do so too. Here is my response:

"Foreign orphans better than ours

Are you for real? How many US children have you adopted or for that matter fostered? Do you realize the foster care system has a primary goal of reunification with bio families which makes adoption very next to impossible or in the very least extremely iffy? Do you know that the foster care system will spend more time trying to fix the bio families in order to place a child back with that family even when the bio family doesn’t wish to change? Do you realize that US adoption is completely handled differently in every state or by each individual agency?

Have you ever considered that your erroneous presumption in this statement “I mean, if it's wrong for people to cross our borders to take our jobs, shouldn't it be wrong for our people to cross our borders to buy someone else's children?” harms all children in adoption or foster care systems and demeans the adoptive families that you criticize? Children are not for sale, not here, not in foreign countries. Processes cost money, agencies charge money, lawyers charge money, the US government charges money all as a part of the process to adopt, and it is all for paperwork, not to buy someone else’s child.

Maybe you should adopt several children of your own. Maybe you should not be so quick to judge other families’ decisions to go out of the country to adopt. Maybe you should work harder to place foster kids and see what the system has created that prevents families from adopting. Your words are hateful, racist and totally and blatantly ignorant. Maybe next time before writing such bothersome articles you will interview families who have adopted domestically, internationally or from foster care to get a grasp of the reasons families choose to adopt in the first place.

Sincerely,

Beverly Moore
An international adoptive single parent"

Friday Five Fun Fotos






I am late participating but these are some pics from G's point of views. Amy at Catching Butterflies hosts this every Friday. It is fun to participate and see what your child sees.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Leave you with a laugh




Retro Friday



I think I am the only blogger doing this anymore, and I am not sure where it started, but I jumped in and enjoy it so here you go.

4th grade and 8th grade going into 9th. My grandmother made the shirt I have on if I remember correctly. I don't remember liking it because I couldn't tie it right.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

What fun to meet a fellow blogger and AP.






Lisa, from NY, came to our fine city to see all of the sites. I "knew" her from SAC yahoo group, now I know her in person. She is a very neat person. I contacted her and told her that I live where she was going to vacay and would she be willing to meet for dinner, and she agreed.

I gathered a few of us adoptive and waiting moms and our respective kids to meet for dinner Tuesday. She and another waiting mom really need encouragement with the wait. Lisa's LID is in Feb or March '06 and Kim's is March '07. So all of our kids entertained them to help them know there is a light at the end of the dark wait. Or at least we mom's would like to think that is what our wonderfully well behaved and light of our world children did.

G didn't really warm up to Lisa for hugs but she did get in another AP mom's lap which is a rare occurrence for her. She was very confused when we dropped Lisa off at the hotel and even wanted to go "pend the night" with her. She is finally warming up to these FCC friends so much that she decided last night she wants to go to the beach with everyone.

Thank you Lisa for your visit. We all had such a good time. You are welcome to come back anytime you like. We are also all anxiously awaiting the arrivals of your and Kim's girls. Hurry up CCAA Hurry Up we have wonderful moms to be waiting for their babes.

Okay So This Is Weird...

I have a very opinionated child. I have a child who hangs onto ideas and thoughts like a vice. I have a child who has decided she wants a new mommy. Yes you read that right. She has been talking about getting a new mommy since Monday. So at first I played along with it, and told her we would look for her a new mommy, but we couldn't do it until Tuesday when I picked her up from school (she spent Monday night with the grandparents).

So Tuesday we went to dinner with some of our friends and a visitor from out of state (I will blog on that next), and G announced she wants a new mommy. I told her to pick one from the table. Well she said she wanted one just like me. Then she relented because everyone was looking at her, and said she didn't want one.

So then in bed last night she brings it up again and this time I decide to ask why she wanted a new mommy and where would she get one. She told me we would go in the parking lot, and she would see a young lady and a sister and she would like them. I asked what would this mother do for her. She told me she would let her type on her computer and play with play doh at her house. I asked where would this new mother live. G said, "In a orphange, but not in China. At her home fa fa away." I asked her if she would forget me and she said yes.

So here is the thing, she has done this twice before. She has lost her first mommy and her foster mommy and forgotten them both. She has gone to live far far way from her foster mommy. So I am feeling a little sad about her losses. She tells me she wants a mommy "just wike you." I told her she couldn't have one like me because I am one of a kind. I also reminded her that she wouldn't have her grandad and grammie with a new mommy.

I asked her who else wanted a new mommy thinking maybe she got this at school and she told me M wants a new mommy. Okay so I know this kid doesn't want a new mommy and said so. G said, "Yes I want her to have a new mommy."

She told me she would even sleep in her own bed at her new mommy's house (yea right). She said she wanted all of her stuff at her new mommy's home. I told her it makes me very sad to talk about that and that I wouldn't want another daughter because I want her as my daughter. Then she decided she didn't want a new mommy either. I said, "good lets not talk about this anymore because it makes me too sad."

So this morning she asks me what day it is and I tell her Thursday. She says, "Yay! I get to find a new mommy." I told her I didn't want to talk about it this morning. I mean let me have coffee first.

Now yesterday morning when she wanted to wear her hot pink flip flops to school, and we couldn't find them. She wanted a new mommy because I wouldn't stop what I was doing to find them right then. We found the flops in her floor of blankets last night.

Oh and I so don't mind talking about her foster mom or her first mom or adoption in general or specifically about her story. Those things, although they make me sad, they do not make me sad enough not to discuss it with her. I will never tell her it makes me sad to make her not want to talk about it. I want her to verbalize her experience and how adoption affects her.

Oh and before I get any strange comments let me say, this is still not RAD. I think she is verbalizing what has happened in the past in a not fully understood way. I think she is still trying to figure out all about her differences and alike-nesses to us, her family. I think she is 3 1/5. She also told me she was going to be 6 and 8 then 2 on her next birthday. I think in her 3 year old way she is looking for reasons that we are a family and trying to make sense of it.

I also remember as a child (probably not 3) wanting a new mom and dad and thinking how cool it would be to have my friends parents as mine. So I figure we will have several years of this wanting new mom thing I just didn't want it to start this early.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Conversations With G


On seeing our dog, Clementine, standing on her hind legs:


"Mama, wook, Tementine almost wook wike a people."

Monday, October 15, 2007

Random pics and important info.

First thing first, look at my little fashionista in her dress up shoes and pajamas? She was asking if she looked beautiful. I told her she did.

Next is this little treasure. This is seaweed snack for the unenlightened. Another adoptive mom of a southern China child turned me onto this and introduced it (in the US) to G shortly after we came home. G loves it. It comes individually wrapped pkg of 3 sheets about 4 inches long by 2 inches or so wide. Now G doesn't eat seafood, well any real meat really, but loves this.

Lastly, you see that precious hand? She must rub her blankie while sipping on her sippy cup. And no we don't do open topped cups at home because she doesn't pay attention well enough not to spill it. I am fine with sippy cups anyway.


In more interesting news, I am having RAD of my left pinkie toenail. It decided to no longer remain attached for no reason at all. Except that it is attached to one side. Doesn't hurt yet but will if it gets caught. Not sure exactly how to remove it since it is the whole toenail and might cause one side to go ingrown. I know it is gross but I don't post lots of gross stuff without a helpful dose of the cute one!

More of G at the Zoo

Throwing money in the wishing water.


G in the aquarium.


G with our friend Shay with the Buddha.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

What a Day

First I have to tell you how smart my dog, Clementine is. As I was sitting here looking at the pictures from the day, Clementine was attempting to get my attention. I said, "Do you want to go outside or take a nap?" and my dog turned and went to jump on the bed looking at me expectantly. So I left the room and she stayed taking a nap with G for about 10 mins. Cool huh?

Now on to the day, we had great fun along with every city employee and their extended families. Today was city employee appreciation day. By 10:15 am the place was packed. When we left sometime after noon the cars were lined up for a long time in a still line.

G had one melt down as soon as we got past the tigers (first stop in the zoo) because she stayed awake too long last night and got up too early this morning. She was already tired and the change from summer to fall gets her emotionally. The funny thing is when I told this to Shay she said it does the same to her.

But the weather was nice and it was cool in the shade. We drug our friend Shay along even though she is coming down with a cold. The pandas were outside playing in their yard. The turtle in the aquarium was out of its shell. The new colt was walking around letting us pet it. G got really close to the chicken walking around.

G went by herself into the prairie dog den after going with me and Shay once each. We didn't make it to the polar bears today but we did see all 3 tigers. Even the elephants were out closer to the fence and people. Then we went and had lunch and G fell asleep on the way home. I moved her to my bed and just 5 mins ago she woke up and is now back asleep in my lap.

If it were closer to 7pm I would just go to bed with her but oh well. Now on to some pics.







Baby monkey in the panda exhibit.





A very tired little girl.

RAD-To Anonymous

Thank you for your concern. But the diagnosis is not RAD. G doesn't rage on a regular basis but I have discovered over the last two years is that as the weather changes into fall, the nights get longer, her mood shifts. That particular morning when I dropped her off was total chaos in the classroom and several kids ran up to her before she could walk in the door good. She needs time to warm up because she is an introvert.

Lashing out at animals is not as harsh as the words sound. Simon the cat is her best friend, but when she doesn't get her way she hits at his tale. She never connects. She isn't hitting at them to hurt them and doesn't do that often either. Mostly she reacts at bed time when Clementine is sitting on her (as Clementine is 60 lbs.). Clementine doesn't do that often because I stop her. She doesn't mean to do that either.

So although I appreciate your comment, I would have appreciated a name with it more, G doesn't have RAD. I started out the adoption process looking at that as possibilities and worried for the first 6 months home. I realize the stuff I put here is just a small portion of what goes on in our lives but if G had RAD, the blog would be where I would discuss it. Since you don't know us and we don't know you, I could see where you might get the impression.


Two of the co-workers I spoke with are therapists and one is very familiar with it as her son has it. RAD is not what you see when you see G. G displays normal 3 1/2 year old behavior. Now also having said that, she does have a need to control her situation and ended up in two 3 minute time outs in 8 minutes last night before bed. She was acting out over needing to control her bed time.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Conversations with G

This took place on the way home today:

Me: So what movie do you want to watch? Cinderella or Beauty and the Beast?

G: Well, I want to watch mermaid.

Me: Well I don't have that one.

G: Aw just give it a chance.

Now where she heard that I have no idea.

Now about the name saga, G, a while ago, decided to go by her middle name, Talley. That was fine at home but then she told her parents and her teachers. Then it became known at my parents church and at the church we currently attend. I think she carried about 3 months, longer than I talked about it on the blog anyway. Two nights ago however, she had decided that G is an okay name and she wants to be called G again. This is good for me because I couldn't get used to Talley anyway.

In school Monday she had an altercation with another girl over a ball and G pulled the other child's hair. So of course the teacher mentioned it to me when I picked her up and informed me that G went in time out, and that she was upset because this teacher had never spoken sternly to her before. I apologized for G and we left. We talked about it that night.

Between picking her up and that night though, G got in trouble with me for not buckling up in the car seat then swiping at me when I buckled her. Yes, G can buckle but not unbuckle, and she likes doing it herself. Anyway, I told her because of the swipe she would be getting a spanking (no comments for it could have been any reprimand which I will explain in a sec.) when we got home. She fell apart and cried cried cried all the way home. Then she raged at home for 45 mins. I held her firmly in my lap until she figured out how to get loose then I had to put her down. I spoke softly to her and attempted to calm her. Then I waited for her and sat within view so she could come get in my lap. After her rage it was over as if there was never a problem.

Now back to the hair pulling, G told me when we got in bed later that her teacher pulled her hair (which happened to be nicely fixed in a pony tail with a bow which was lost at school) and that it "really hurt." I was mad. First, the school is a hands off school. Second, G was punished twice with a hair pull and a time out. The time out would have been enough. Third, the teacher didn't tell me about her pulling hair back. The teacher told me she spoke sternly to G and that made her cry.

So I told my mom and a couple of co-workers, and only one co-worker told me not to put up with that and if I let it slide more will happen. So I confronted the teacher and told her that although I understood her reasoning, she should not ever do it again, and she agreed. She also admitted to giving G a "little tug" but wasn't aware that G was "tender headed." Like that mattered?!

See I didn't like this teacher in the first place, but G really likes her. She is even worried if this teacher will like her outfits and asks me every morning if I think she will. "Mama, do you fink Ms. C will not yike dis outpit?" Weird!!

Tuesday, when I picked G up she requested to go buy stickers. Well, she didn't mind me about getting in her car seat on the first time so I said no to the stickers (no stickers was the punishment for not minding). Then she cried and cried and cried all the way home (this week it didn't matter what the reprimand). She didn't rage as hard, but she cried when we got home and hit at the cats and dogs. For that she got a swat on the bottom; I can't tolerate her swiping at the dogs and cats from anger. Then she wanted to be held.

Not to be out done, last night after lights were out, she continued to wiggle and squirm, then she decided she needed to go poop. Well, first it was a stay up technique used not very much so I fall for it. She usually just wiggles and squirms and kicks and talks. Second, it required a pull-up change because she had peed the one pullup already. Third, it required my half dozed self to turn the lights on and get up.

For my child (see I am so noble), I got up, got a new pullup, put G on the pot, and threw away the wet one. In that act of throwing away the old, you would have thought I cut up blankie with the melodrama. She literally bounced on the seat crying for the wet pullup, and then when I got her down she stamped her feat, crying hysterically the whole time, with just her pj top on, for that wet pullup. Finally, I said, "fine you are going to bed with nothing (reverse psych, thank goodness it worked or I would have been in a bad mess). She relented and let me put the pull up on but then cried that I didn't do it like a baby cause she is a baby.

Well, I told her I would hold her like a baby which I did. Then I got in bed and held and rocked her giving her the water from her sippy cup like a bottle. I told her when we first came home and she would wake from a bad dream I used to hold her like that and hold her bottle for her. She calmed down, but it was another 30 mins before she actually fell asleep. I am so glad today is Friday.


After this week, I am so glad tomorrow is Sat and we are going to the zoo. We need a relaxing day with no time constraints.

8 Things in My Kitchen Meme

Then Steph tagged me for an 8 random things in the kitchen meme. At least I hope she meant me cause I am running with it. 1st is a waffle maker that doubles as a place to dry paint brushes and hold melatonin for my dog. 2nd is my dog in her kennel. She gets out when we are home.

3rd are some old jars that my grandmother had, I use for flower vases but I don't have any flowers now.



4th is the kitchen table or dumping off place. No worries we have a dining table too that one end is clear for eating.

Next a picnic basket never used but I really like it so I won't get rid of it. Plus it is Tupperware.


Two very important appilances, my cappucino maker and my rice cooker. Then my collection of recipe books that are rarely if ever used.


Last are the banned contraban of children's meds. This stays on the counter because at any given time G could have a leg pain, a bad runny nose or just need a little calming syrup. Actually the syrup is used every morning on either French toast or waffles.

There you have it. Now I tag: Amy, Sandra,
Alison, and Baggage and Bug. Participate if you wish and leave a note.