Thursday, July 24, 2008

Cancer

Remember this? My parents received word yesterday that the kidney cancer found in my aunt has spread into her bones. There is nothing they can do to save her. She currently has a blood infection from who knows where and is in quarantine. Her doctor told my cousin that she will not be able to go to the wedding but they could have a service there in her room when she is able. So the one dream my aunt had of seeing her only son get married and start a family won't come true. And you know what is sad? This same aunt is counting the number of get well cards and making note of (and commenting on) the family members who didn't send her one. How sad is that?!?!?

My one thought is G and I won't be able to see her alive and I don't think she is a believer so we won't even see her in death. That is a hard reality to face and makes me so sad. I was hoping that work would have given me a raise enough to be able to get tickets for G and me for a long weekend to see her. Oh well. How do I fix that? No it is not work not giving me a large enough raise that I don't have the money so I am not upset with work for that; those were all my mistakes and hopes. I am mad at myself for not having the money to go though.

I would like to see her alive one more time and let G see her again. But she will be flown home and buried here so at least we will have some closure. I hate that financial burden for her son just after he is married. My dad will make all of the burial arrangements though and pay for them. Their family is dwindling seems rapidly. Just now my dad and his brother left in the immediate family. Boy life is so precious and fleeting.