Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Just Some Randomness

G spent last night with my parents. She and they had arranged it Sunday evening when she went to church with them. I of course was left out of the arrangement details until G decided to call her grammie yesterday. Anyway, I was able to get on my mom's computer (much faster than my own) and apply for 3 positions.

I woke up in the most foul mood yesterday morning and feel so badly that I was such a grump. G doesn't deserve those days. This not working or not having a purpose (for me) is for the birds. I realize now how much I am not cut out to be a SAHM. I don't really enjoy it like I thought I might at another time in my life. Maybe it is because I am forced to be one rather than of my own free will. Whatever it is I am ready to work again and dreading it all at once.

No, I have no prospects at all. Unemployment in our area is pretty high. I am pretty discouraged at it all. At least I have unemployment still. I suppose this year's taxes won't be bad at all, heh.

Oh and while completing an on-line job app yesterday I looked at a the website for the job that laid me off to get a number and realized there were some changes. So I finally got in touch with one of the guys with whom I had made friends and he said that my boss was let go a month after me. Now this boss was supposedly a partner and moved to this town just for that position. He relocated his wife and two small pre-school aged children away from her parents (his parents are dead) and away from any family for this position. He is an attorney and a pilot.

Then three weeks ago they fired another partner who was legally an actual partner (one of three who started the company). So now the owners are down to two of the original business partners. Can you say "poetic justice"?

Definitely gave me a much better sense about my situation. And I am not glad to know that other people have lost their jobs. I think it gives me a sense that I was right about there being something conniving and planned or dirty business going on. It was a crazy company.

One owner there who knows security and sort of knows how to run a business, not necessarily on the up and up, and the other holds all the money, ALL. OF. IT, the one made sure that he and the rich one were the two left standing. This one had to get rid of all the people he didn't trust before he could be confident to be one of the only two. Where I came in was that I was hired under two women whom he did not trust. They were the first two to go while I was there back in March 2008. So eventually the rich one will have it all figured out before this company is run into the ground like the other guy's last company. But if he doesn't too bad.

So I had promised G a swimming day today but it rained and I am a cold wimp. Plus it isn't supposed to be hot today and showers are still possible. I hate that I unintentionally lied about it. She has already called me on grandad's phone to see why we weren't going swimming. Even a "will see" is a yes to a child. I have to remember that.


AZMom said...

Oh that just plain sux about not being able to find a job but yes there is some poetic justice going on about the last job you held. I do hope you find something soon.

I did the SAHM thing for a few years and yes, it can wear on you. I think part time work would be best for me but that is not going to happen for a few years at least.

Still hoping and praying for you. I know it's not easy for you.

Vivian M said...

We are still learning the meaning of "maybe" here too.
That company is mesed up!
Still sending prayers that something comes your way. Don't lose hope!

Gretchen said...

I hope the job situation improves. I'm not cut out to be a SAHM either.

Is there volunteer work in your area that might help give you more a sense of purpose? What about signing up to be a substitute teacher in the fall? I don't know about your state, but that usually only requires a bachelor's degree. Education is pretty recession proof.

The Byrd's Nest said...

I am praying for you Bev....I always pray for you. I cannot even imagine what this must feel like...so helpless. But He is there with you...just keep your focus on Him sweet girl.