Thursday, August 22, 2013

School: 4 Days In

Well, we had bad night on first day of school with G being grounded from her electronics for the week. I will return them Saturday morning because an unoccupied G is a bad deal for me. Mom reminded me why she never grounded any of us, it is more trouble on the parent than the child.

Then Tuesday morning I casually asked her to change out of her white t-shirt because it was quite see through which brought many protestations and culminated in tears and all kinds of stuff. Seriously, when the Proverbs 22:15 proclaims foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, it was on FULL display Tuesday and not in a fun way.

G told me Tuesday evening, that her grounding would only be until Friday (though I had not told her that bit of info) and that I couldn't spank her while she is grounded. I pointed out that I wouldn't spank her for the grounding offense but anything else that warranted spanking could result in one. But her telling me what I could or could not do and for how long (grounding) showed me how bad the evening would be because she was already in defiant mode.

Tuesday evening turned out to be almost as bad as Monday evening. G informed me that she did not like me (without provocation mind you) to which I calmly replied, "You aren't required to like me." then returned to making dinner. I was truly doing what I could to no respond or react but she was quite mean. I had mentioned that I thought maybe a Bible study with some of her friends would do us all good but she refused to even contemplate attending one. We had opportunity to go to a concert by a Christian artist (we did get tickets) but when I told G about it she defiantly said she didn't want to go. That is she didn't want to go until I started to log onto e-mail and let the person who had the tickets know we didn't want them, then all of a sudden she did want to go.

Yesterday morning was tense because G would rather play, literally took 9 minutes to eat 3 pieces of bacon, than get ready for school. REALLY?! so then I was on the nagging train and kept hurrying her along which frustrates me. I know she slows down when I fuss but for whatever reason I didn't stop myself. We had plenty of time but GAH! the child can be s-o v-e-r-y s-l-o-w that it drives me totally batty!

This morning was much better and I hope tonight will be as well. Bedtime G consistently tries to stay awake. I have given her as little as 4 minutes to fall asleep after I turned the lights out in response to her constant questions or squirming. If she gets still and quiet she does fall asleep fast. I have no idea why she wishes to stay awake. And the questions she comes up with and all the "but mama..." drives me crazy at bedtime.

G asked me why I wasn't putting notes in her lunch box anymore then proceeded to tell me what the previous notes had said. The common theme was "I love you and am very proud of you. Jesus loves you too!" That is what I would end my notes with every day plus have a question about school that she could answer. This morning I wrote her a note and I need to get these notes in more often. I totally forgot to do them. I haven't purchased the little flip notebooks I used either so I suppose a target trip is in order.

Last night she told me something that happened at school with a girl who has known G since pre-school. This girl is the same girl who convinced G that being a boy was good, pink was bad and for G to be this girl's friend G had to do as this girl said, all at the age of 3-4 years old. Anyway, I had managed to keep them out of the same class until this year. Now they have homeroom together. So, this child asked G if G was Korean or just tan like herself. G told her she was tan and ignored her. Yes, I find it terribly funny. This was not pure curiosity because this child has seen G almost weekly for the past 8 years. Knowing this child there had to be something behind the question at this point in their knowing each other. It could be innocent but I am highly skeptical. Plus the child's parents know G as well. Most everybody knows she was adopted from China as well.

And before I get blow back, you must understand I allow G to determine for herself the intent of the question. I encourage her to be kind to the curious, because she herself is curious, but for other questions of nosiness or hurtful intent, she can be as snarky as she likes. I have encouraged her to err on the said of general curiosity until it is very apparent that harm is intended. G is pretty perceptive and very observant so I for now trust her judgement about these things.

Work is starting to get busier which is good. I am still very tired every afternoon but age I suppose has something to do with that. Soon G and I will be on our little mini vacay. We both are getting excited about it. The money could look better on paper but we will be back on target in a month or so. I am not near as stressed as I was at the doctor's office which has shown in the weight gain, heh. Coffee consumption is still down and water intake is up. Large salads at lunch are still high in calories and without caloric output I haven't any hope. G and I are getting back in the swing of push ups and sit ups at bedtime. I have to allow them past the bedtime limit because I need to do them as well as G. Running/walking has been pushed to the future for now.

The weather here has been very nice and just in the last two days has gotten into the 90s. Maybe we will have a not so cold winter again and go into fall at cool temps. I am ready for fall and winter.


Vivian M said...

Kerri has often said she doesn't like us (usually when she isn't getting her way), and I usually reply that I don't like her behaviour but I still love her. She is testing limits alot at this age.
She also doesn't like going to bed, and tries asking questions, saying she is thirsty, or hungry, or making excuses or negotiating. If we say 5 minutes she asks for 15.
So hang in there! I think there are many of us that are going through the same things.
Glad work is good!

Lauri Jackson said...

hang in there.. we are dealing with similar back to school transition issues