Sunday, December 18, 2016

2 Posts in a Month

So this is about a conversation G and I had one night.  G is obsessed about height, specifically, people's height.  She wants to know how tall people will be including herself.  Currently, she is 5 ft-ish.  I think she is 5'1" but not sure.  I haven't any idea how tall she will be.  I never was really concerned with how tall I would be at her age.  I just don't remember being so obsessed about this particular feature.  Maybe I was just taking my future height for granted.

Anyway, one night after the 15th question about a little Indian (from India) boy and how tall I thought he would be based on his parents who were raised in India, I asked her why she was obsessed and why it mattered.

She said, "I don't have anyone to look at to tell how tall I will be. You have grammie and grandad.  S has his parents, but I don't know how tall my parents were."

Touche'.  That stopped me.  I said, "okay, fair enough."  I went on to explain that even if she knew how tall her China parents were she still might not know how tall she would be now that she is living in America.  I explained that due to nutrition and her location in China she would be smaller than she is now living in America if she had stayed in China.  I told her that the China growth charts for children really are different from the US.  I also explained that though I do know what my parents look like I actually am the shortest in my family other than my mom and am not as tall as my dad, so even with knowing what parents look like I still would not have known my future height.

I am not going to say that I will not continue to be annoyed with all the obsessive questions about height.  I will, however, try to be more patient when talking to her.  This is one of the rare moments when adoption affects us.  One of the rare moments that she is conscious or more so and willing to discuss it than she is generally.  She continually insists that her eyes don't look Chinese and that all eyes are almond shaped.  She is very funny in this obsession.

So I just wanted this out there.  Sometimes adoption is a thing and sometimes it isn't.  Parents just need to be aware of this and question appropriately to guide growing kids through the thought processes.

Today G had a friend over to decorate (pre-packaged) ugly sweater cookies.  This friend knows that together they decorate gingerbread houses and told her mom that she and G hadn't done that yet.  I told G that and G was glad she remembered that that is a tradition now for them.  At this moment they are at a church function watching the friend's sister in a Christmas program.  Then they will go to my mom's church to a Christmas party.  Neither girl is good at using the phone to keep in touch with each other.  G's phone is jacked up and the texting feature doesn't work.  Her friend consistently leaves hers uncharged or lost for days on end.    I warned them that they had better find another way to contact each other or they won't be speaking in the future.  Of course I was kidding.

May or may not post before Christmas or after Christmas.  So Merry Christmas and Happy Holy Days.

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